I am so sick and tired of waking up panicked because I'm scared I did something to screw up my friendship with an old co-worker. Both Alvaro and I have had so much love and respect for him and he's kinda dumped us. I know it sounds stupid, but he was someone I thought would be in my life forever. Alvaro and I have talked about him being another grandparent figure to our kids.
Now we can't call or text or email him and get a response. It's heartbreaking. And to top it all off... he had promised Alvaro a job, and we now don't know what to do.
I talked to one of my dearest and oldest friends about this, and her advice was that "it's the holidays and he's probably not thinking about it". I think in many ways she's right. But how do I calm my heart down?
I have prayed so much and prayed more. I don't want this pressure to affect Alvaro and I really didn't want to lose a friend. I'm learning more and more how hard they are to find.
I need help. Prayers. Advice. Whatever. What are your thoughts?
4 comments:
I'll keep you guys in my prayers.
Also, have you tried taking him a small Christmas present? Not to suck up or anything, but like a small plate of cookies or something just to let him know you care? If he still doesn't respond, well, at least you can't say you didn't try.
I know these things are hard and waiting to see what happens stinks. My mom used to always sing to us Doris Day's 'Que Sera, Sera, whatever will be will be, the future's not our's to see, que sera sera." That may or may not be applicable here, but it just popped into my head! :) I think she was just telling us not to worry about what we can't control (after all we've done, of course). But again, you're in my prayers and I love ya!
My thoughts are 1) maybe he had something major come up in his life that is taking priority over everything else 2) maybe things regarding the job fell through and he is trying to work them out before he gives you a response 3) maybe he is no longer able to give Alvaro a job and doesn't know how to tell you guys.
I like the idea of going to his house to drop off a simple holiday gift. If he isn't home maybe have a card ready that says something simple, but to the effect that you value his friendship and if you have done something to offend him, or if there are issues with the job then jut please let you know because you would like to still have him in your lives. And if he answers the door then say that - but keep it simple, polite and non-accusatory (not that you wouldn't, but just saying :)
I think from there the ball is in his court - whether he responds or not, you have no control over, but you will know that you have done everything that you can do.
On a side note, I had the same type of situation with an employee, who just dropped off the face of the planet...I never found out what happened and it bugged me for a long time, but what can you do? Let it eat at you or let it go....
I second the two thoughts above (or below... however this gets posted). If this job doesn't work out, something better (and better for you) will happen. It always does. You are in my prayers, and "whatever will be, will be." Love ya!
Thank you. Those comments/advice were REALLY helpful. I love you all so much! I have been blessed with two of THE best friends I could ever have that know me for me. And to top it off I have the best family, immediate and extended. Thank you all. This really has helped.
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